Sunday, November 24, 2013

Give up Christmas Expectations and LOVE yourself

 Why do I try so hard to look as if I have it all together? I know I don't! You know I don't, but yet I still try.  As, I sit here on my 12 yr old dirty and falling apart couch with my kids who are really getting on my nerves, my hubby who I just grumbled at is scratching something together to eat for himself and the kids.  I sit among a house in disarray with Christmas décor scattered all over the living room with my tree that has a short in the lights. All I really want to do is cry.  I have soooo much to be thankful for healthy children who can run and play in this big mess!  A hubby who loves me in my "yuck" moments, that I am in at the moment. But, most of all I have a Savior Jesus who saved me from my sins.

So, why can't I muster up a happy spirit and get to decorating my pre-lit spinning tree?  Is it because my sister who I thought up until 8 hrs ago was coming to stay a few days is not coming? Or is it because the lights on the upper part of the tree aren't working? Or feeling sorry for myself because I'm broke this season. Or is it the combo of all of it?

I have all these big expectations for myself... Big garlands around my kitchen window, bay-window & front door.  I want my tree to look professionally put together (like on Pinterest). Not like my children who still want to decorate our tree actually did it!  I want beautifully wrapped gifts that coordinate with the tree! My 2-elves (elf on the shelf) make messes daily so my kids 'can show them grace.' I would like to make sure my already purchased C-mas cards go out on Dec. 2nd and I get my 20 free Walgreen's Thank-you cards created before the deadline!  I'd better get to making chex-mix and other goodies for the neighbors along with doing a daily devotions & advent calendar activities with my children. I need something great for my hubby for C-mas without having to spend a fortune I don't have, and hinting over and over for what he'd like.  Anxiety is creeping over me at the moment.  I'm just being real sisters!

So right now I'm going to think about what is *true* about myself (Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.  Philippians 4:8)....I CP am-
-Loved (by-Jesus, Grant, Family & Friends)
-I'm cared for
-I'm a good cook
-I care for my family better that I give
myself credit for
-I'm training my children up in the way
of the Lord Jesus Christ
-I want the best for others
-I pray often and I'm truly strengthened
by the Lord
-I know how to make those closest to me "smile"
-I'm dependable
-I'm creative
-I'm a good teacher

Wow, honestly that really did help!  If you are struggling with the "expectations" you have put on yourself stop.  Sit down and make a list of the gifts and talents you have.  God created us all different and He did this because he knows best.  Life is not fair it never will be.  Jesus totally understands, think of how fair his life was?  Sit still, and ask Jesus how He feels for you in this moment.  You and I were worth dying for yes dying for!

This poor pathetic tree is a good reminder of myself in a life of expectations.  I can't do it!  I can't function under my crazy "expectations".  What does God expect of me this Christmas?    "And what does the Lord require of you?
To act justly and to love mercy
    and to walk humbly[a] with your God. "
Micah 6:8
So this Christmas I'm going to have my kids decorate our tree as I sip on something warm with kids Christmas carols playing in the background. I'm not gonna fix that strand of lights that isn't working as a reminder to myself that I don't have to meet my "MISS Perfect" expectations.  If I do anymore Christmas decorating it will because I want to not because I have to!

The birth of Jesus is the reason for the season and what a beautiful gift you and I were given.  Join me in not allowing the joy and blessings to be stolen from us.

Love to each of you who read this blog!  May you join me in my efforts to slow down and take the *crazy expectations* off of ourselves!  What do you like most and dislike most during the holidays?

Give credit where credit is do-
Pinterest- Jesus, Santa & the Elf on the Shelf


  1. Yes!! Yes!! Yes!! You know what I'm looking forward to... "new traditions". ;-)

  2. Love this! And I love you. Thank you for your honesty.

  3. A refreshing piece of work. Made me smile thx ;)

  4. WOW Crystal! You hit the nail on the head :) Thank you for your's so true how we try to really outdo ourselves and then we miss out on what this season is truly all about. I love how you decided to leave the tree lights as is. You helped remind me how thankful I am for God's abundant Grace!!!

    1. Thank you! May you have a blessed, family & Christ focused Christmas!

  5. Ok so I am being intentional this year about stopping the stress and making memories. Don't get me wrong :I love the weather, the music, the decorations, the family, the lights, the reason, the whole season. With that said, I don't like the memories and moments I've missed in years passed when I have stressed over having the perfect tree and decorations. So, this year, I am focusing more on the reason and making memories. It is very hard because I LOVE the decorating and planning but- every time I go to decorate something myself or get stressed because I can't get what I want to make it perfect...I just say, does it really matter and try to think of a way to turn it into an amazing memory. I've already made a conscience effete two times this year and the memories have been more than worth giving up my over the top decorating expectations I put on myself. One tradition we added (instead of wrapping every branch with lights) we wrapped ALL if our Christmas books and numbered them 1-25. We unwrap one and read it all together every night. It was fun, the kids loved wrapping and have lived the time together reading every evening. It's been something I've wanted to do for three years and never got around to it. I put decorating over it on my priority list....this year is about making memories while celebrating the birth of Jesus and not letting my expectations of my house, or myself, stress me out. So far, im really enjoying it. Thanks for sharing. It's good to know I have a friend to help me be intentional and focus on family.